


snowy days and doting nights

by russiasnataliaa



Series: forever and always [2]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Domestic Avengers, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, F/M, Family, Flashbacks, Fluff, Marriage, Parenthood, Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-02
Updated: 2020-05-02
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:33:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23962420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/russiasnataliaa/pseuds/russiasnataliaa
Summary: “How about this — ” he rests his hands on her thighs and caresses her lightly. “ — You and Liho stay here and sleep and I could get cleaned up and get breakfast going?”or natasha and james enjoying each other’s company on a snowy saturday.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Natasha Romanov
Series: forever and always [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1654330
Comments: 4
Kudos: 44





	snowy days and doting nights

Over the last four months of her pregnancy, Natasha’s learned one thing.

_Never sleep on the far side of the bed._

You could say that her and James each have their respective sides on their shared bed, but every now and then, if Natasha’s feeling a little clingy — not that she’d ever admit to that — they’ll switch sides, just so that she can be completely surrounded by his scent. Last night happened to be one of those times. He’d smiled at her shy request, and happily changed sides with her, grinning to himself at how she fell asleep pretty much right after her head hit his pillow. But for the past month and a half, there’s been a downside to that. Their bathroom is on the _other_ side of the room, and James’ side is a couple extra feet away from it than hers, which, believe it or not, makes a huge difference. And with the way she’s positioned right now, tucked under James’ chin, his flesh arm wrapped around her waist and his hand placed softly on her growing stomach, she’s not sure if she’ll make it to the bathroom in time. She tries — she _really_ does — to ignore the growing pressure in her bladder, shuts her eyes tightly and snuggles closer to James in hopes that she won’t have to get up for what’ll be the third time for the night.

James must’ve felt her fidgeting because the next thing she knows, he’s gently encouraging her to get out of bed.

“Natalia…” he mumbles, eyes still closed and his voice heavy with sleep. “If you make a mess on this bed I can _assure_ you I’m not changing these sheets…” he states deeply, but the edge is taken off with his face buried in her hair. She smirks faintly because she knows he’s all talk and doesn’t mean it, he’s too chivalrous to let her change the sheets on her own, even though she’s more than capable. But she’s not _that_ lazy to just lay there when her bladder is basically screaming at her now, and she’s not in the mood to change clothes either.

_Kid, 1. Natalia, 0._

Sighing, she pats James’ arm for him to ease off her, and the first thing she registers when she lifts the blanket up is how freaking cold it is in their bedroom. She looks to the window and notices that it’s snowing lightly. Again. This January has been a cold one for New York, and it’s been snowing on and off almost everyday for the past week.

Not that she’s complaining. Natasha’s always loved the snow.

She yawns as she swings her legs over the edge of the bed, scooching forward a bit so her feet can reach her slippers. Sleep is still calling her name, and she grumbles softly in annoyance at how _little_ of it she’s been getting for the last few weeks. She hasn’t had an uninterrupted night of sleep for the past month. _Better than having night terrors, though._

_Kid, 2. Natalia, 0._

A moment later, she’s standing, and it takes all her strength and willpower _not_ to crawl back in bed, to snuggle up between Liho and James. But, much to her vexation, she feels gravity coming into play a few seconds later and speedwalks as quietly as she can to the bathroom, not wanting to disrupt James any further.

After relieving herself and washing her hands, she turns off the light and pads back across the room, a smile tugging at her lips when she sees James, who’s lifting the blanket waiting for her to return to bed.

“Go back to sleep, _moya lyubov_ ,” she climbs back underneath the duvet, voice barely above a whisper.

“You’re the only thing that helps me sleep,” is his reply as his arm returns back to its original position.

“Liho is right here,” she states as said kitten totters in her direction, bumping her head against her nose.

“He only likes _you_ — ”

“ _She_ ,” she slaps him halfheartedly on his hand. He does this sometimes — gives Liho the wrong pronouns — just to annoy her, knowing how much she cares for the kitten. “And that’s not true, she likes you, too.” There's a chance they might not go to sleep after this, almost never do when they start their days with their playful, trademark banter. Through an opening in their curtains, she can see it’s snowing a little harder now, and as time passes, it only gets brighter outside.

“All she does is bully me.”

“Bully — James, how does she _bully_ you?” she snorts, finding his tone hilarious. _He can't be serious_.

“When you’re gone, she likes to scratch me. And she stares at me and follows me around,” he complains. Natasha turns to face him and can’t help but burst out laughing at how he’s frowning.

“Well, maybe if you gave her attention, she wouldn’t do that. She just wants you to play with her,” she says, making puppy eyes and an over exaggerated pout back at him. And as he finally opens his eyes, all he can think about is how unbothered she looks, caressing Liho while looking up at him with that playful glint in her eyes. 

_What a dork_.

“Well, maybe if she wouldn’t _scratch_ me, I’d be willing to play,” and at that, Natasha leans forward and kisses him because with the light hitting him just so and his eyes half closed from sleep, he just looks _too_ good for her to not. It’s not like their usual morning kisses—those will come sooner or later. This one is soft and chaste and full of adoration. He smiles when she pulls away, the corners of his eyes creasing in the way that she loves.

“What was that for?”

“Nothing,” is her reply, light and sweet and _God_ , the way James’ chest tightens with affection from her answer should be illegal. A beat later, he’s pulling her closer and closing the short space between them once more, tipping her chin up gently and kissing her languorously. They’re both smiling into the kiss now, and for the same reason.

_They love this._

It’s appropriate to say that they have a certain, unofficial routine on Saturday’s and this is a major part of it. It paves the way for what the rest of the day will be like — pure cuddling and kisses and just relishing in each other’s presence. They complement each other so well on the field, work seamlessly together — everyone knows this. But the same can be said for their intimate moments as well.

It’s not until they pull away, panting (more for Natasha’s sake than his since he can go longer without air) and high off of ecstasy, that they finally greet each other for the day.

<“Good morning, my love.”>

<“Good morning to you too, duchess.”> he plants a kiss on her nose, and she leans into the gesture until their foreheads are touching. Taking Liho back in her arms, Natasha moves to straddle James, sitting lightly on his stomach. “How’re my girls feeling today?” he reaches up to brush a few strands of hair away from her face. She hums and scrunches her nose in thought, doing a mental rundown of her body, looking for the right words to describe how she’s feeling this morning.

“She’s calm this morning,” she smiles, looking down at her bump. “And I don’t feel nauseous, so that’s a plus,” James smiles softly at that because up until last week, morning sickness had been Natasha’s sole enemy.

“You should still eat some crackers though, just in case,” he reaches for the box of saltines on his nightstand (yes, _his_ nightstand because if it was up to Natasha, she’d never eat them) and hands her a new pack. She rests Liho down on her lap and takes them begrudgingly, heaving a big sigh as she opens it. She knows they help with the nausea — more than she’d like to admit, but they’re dry and they make her awfully thirsty.

After managing to chew about five or six crackers, she puts them back in the box and hands it to James.

“How about you?” she asks softly, carding one of her hands through his hair and resting it on his cheek. “How’d you sleep?”

“Good, good,” he leans into her touch, appreciating how soft and warm her hands are. “I know you didn’t, though.”

“Nope,” she sighs, and now that he’s brought it up, she feels her exhaustion creeping up on her again. Natasha knows she can go back to sleep, basically has all the time in the world to do so, but she doesn’t want to stop talking to James. She enjoys his company too much to let a few yawns and droopy eyes get in the way of this. And it’s not like he isn’t home often — it’s actually quite the opposite. Ever since they’d told Fury about Natasha being pregnant, he’d reassigned all her missions and had given her strict orders not to go on any Avengers related operations. He’d also given James far less missions, which resulted in him going on about one to two ops per month, _only_ if he couldn’t get Clint or another top agent to go (and Natasha, who couldn’t resist being away from work for too long, had requested she _at least_ get paperwork, so every week Fury would send her a stack of files for her to complete).

So now that James is home pretty much all the time, one would expect that she’d be satisfied with that. But her hormones have become so out of whack that she's ten times more clingy than she was before.

Even so, it doesn’t make much of a difference to him — they’ve always been inseparable, always will be.

“How about this — ” he rests his hands on her thighs and caresses her lightly. “ — You and Liho stay here and sleep and I could get cleaned up and get breakfast going?” she sits quietly for a few moments, contemplating on whether or not she really wants him to leave her side.

_He’ll be right downstairs, Natalia. Stop being such a baby._

“Could we have breakfast… in bed?” she asks, placing her other hand atop his.

“Whatever you want, doll,” he smiles and she all but lights up at his answer.

Natasha sighs happily, sliding off of James and moving to rest her head on his chest as he wraps an arm around her smoothly. “You spoil me, you know.”

“Well, you’re not complaining, are you?” he tickles her lightly at her side, eliciting a small giggle from her and James can’t help his heart from swelling at the fact that he brings those reactions from her.

<“Absolutely not.”> she says and he laughs. They fall into a comfortable silence soon after and lay there for a while — Natasha getting lost in the thud of his heartbeat and James alternating between rubbing circles and petting her back gently. It’s only been about three minutes when her eyes start to close, despite her efforts of staying awake, and five minutes when James feels her breathing even out. He looks down to find her fast asleep with one hand pressed up against his chest, clutching onto his shirt softly. It doesn’t take him long to position her comfortably under the covers, pulling the duvet up to her chin just the way she likes it. He picks Liho up next and gently places her near Natasha and can't help but smirk and shake his head in amusement at how attached they are as the little thing crawls her way over to snuggle up by her cheek. He then goes over to their window, closing the blinds so the gleam of the snow doesn’t bother them.

“I love you, _malen’kaya printsessa_ ,” James leans down to kiss the blanket where Natasha’s baby bump is. “And I love you,” he whispers, moving up to kiss her nose and forehead as she snores away softly.

* * *

It’s almost one p.m. when James begins preparing breakfast.

After he left Natasha to rest, he’d shaved the bit of stubble that’d grown over the past two days, taken a shower and gotten dressed in black, fleece sweats and a white t-shirt, which took about half an hour. He’d quietly checked on Natasha after that, only to find her knocked out cold, breathing a little heavier than before, which was a good sign; she was finally getting some greatly needed sleep. In addition to that, she’d managed to move from where he put her and took up the whole bed with one leg sticking out from under the blanket and her mouth opened slightly. She had Liho cuddled up next to her, who was also fast asleep. He’d chuckled softly as he pulled the door in, deciding on letting her sleep a while longer before starting breakfast and waking her up again.

That was three hours ago.

He actually got a lot of things done in that time, including folding up towels and washcloths that had been waiting in the laundry basket since Wednesday, taking out the garbage and recycling and finishing up some paperwork he needed for work on Monday. Sam had also called in that time, asking how him and Natasha were doing and if everything was good. They’d both laughed when James informed him about how she was sleeping like a log and that she might be falling into Steve’s footsteps. Eventually, they’d said their goodbyes after making plans to do something with him and Steve. 

Now, he was placing five slices of freshly baked bread in the toaster oven and had bacon frying over on the stove. There was a cute little bakery just two blocks away from them, and Natasha loved it when they had fresh loaves of bread. Recently, she’d been craving it more than ever, so James decided on buying a loaf to surprise her for breakfast this morning.

Well, this afternoon _._

James takes her three pieces out earlier than his; she only likes her bread a little crisp, not exactly toasted. He takes the butter and a jug of iced tea (which he’d made extra sweet just for her) out the fridge and spreads a generous amount of butter on her pieces. He takes her strips of bacon off the stove earlier as well and places it next to her bread and waits a little longer for his toast to get a little more brown and for his bacon to get a little crispier before placing them on his own plate. Only then does he reach up into the cabinet to get the black, wooden breakfast-in-bed table that they use for days such as this one. He pours two glasses of the iced tea, takes both plates and places everything on the tray.

James takes his time when he enters their bedroom, not really wanting to disturb Natasha’s slumber, but he has to wake her. When he crosses the room and reaches their bed, he places the tray on his nightstand and pushes one of her legs over so he can sit down after opening the blinds back up.

“Tasha?” James whispers, touching her lightly on her arm. “Natalia,” he sing-songs, really not wanting to wake her up, but it’s getting late and she needs to eat. She starts to stir, groaning softly in protest at the light coming from their large window. But it only lasts a moment before she settles back down, burrowing further under the covers and moving closer to Liho.

“C’mon, angel, open your eyes? For me?” he asks softly, brushing his thumb across her porcelain cheek, leaving it there for a moment. Her eyebrows furrow as she shakes her head faintly.

“‘M _tired_ , James,” she mumbles.

“But I thought you wanted breakfast in bed?” He leans in to press a chaste kiss on her cheek and nose. “I even got you that bread from the bakery down the street that you love so much.” With her brain only half awake and sleep still tugging at her eyelids, it takes a bit for her to realize what he said, but when she does, she breathes in deeply and sighs, finally opening her eyes to look at him, trying to hold back a smile but failing.

“There’s my girl,” he smiles at the way her face begins to light up, even more so because of her new ‘pregnancy glow’.

“You toasted it the way I like it, too,” she’s looking at the tray now, her smile growing as she thinks about how much she adores him for all this. To someone else, breakfast in bed may not be something significant, but Natasha cherishes all the little things, especially when they’re from James.

“Only the best for you, my love,” he winks, helping her sit up beside him. He positions himself under the covers before reaching to his nightstand to bring the tray over to them. She wiggles happily in place for a second when he hands her her plate and he chuckles, not even the least bit surprised at her action. If there’s one thing he knows about Natasha, it’s that she loves food. It was one of the first things he learned about her when their relationship was still fairly new, and had taken her on dates to restaurants or fairs so she could try new things. Although, it’s all pretty ironic seeing that the girl can’t cook to save her life, save for a simple sandwich or some tea or coffee.

“‘I’m assuming you slept well?” he raises an eyebrow before taking a small sip of his drink.

“Mhm,” she smiles. “How long was I out?” she asks as she reaches for her toast and takes a bite, her eyes fluttering closed and a sigh of content leaving her as she savors the taste she’d craved so long.

“Ehh, ‘bout three hours,” he chuckles. “ It’s after one now.” She nods her head before biting a piece of bacon and James smiles inwardly at how small her mouthful is compared to his and finding her pretty damn cute.

“What’d you do while I was hanging with the living dead?” she smirks, still finding herself absolutely hilarious despite the countless times James — and the rest of her friends for that matter — would call her corny. Natasha had always been full of wit and sarcasm since her days in the Red Room and nothing had or would ever change that. After she’d joined SHIELD and started a new life, she’d also started to find herself for who she really was and not what she was trained or expected to be. Over the years she’d found her sense of humor, and if James was being honest, it was one of his favorite things about her.

“I folded up the laundry, _finally_. Got the bread, took out the garbage, and got a few fruits and veggies from the farmers market,” he said after swallowing the food in his mouth. “Oh, and Sam said hey.”

“He called?”

“Mhm, just checking up and stuff.”

“How’s he?” she asks before starting her second piece of bread while subconsciously walking her middle and index fingers back and forth across her stomach, an innocent habit she picked up a few weeks ago.

“He’s pretty good, actually. Avengers work and all that has been going smoothly down at the compound for him and Steve,” he reaches for his glass to take another drink. “The three of us made plans to go out to a movie and maybe go bowling next Saturday night,” he’s about to go for another piece of bacon before he stops himself and looks over at her. “But of course, if you want me to stay home I can just—”

“James,” she chuckles. “I don’t need you to wait hand and foot for me all the time, y’know. Go out and enjoy yourself.”

“I _do_ know that,” he smirks. “But, what if—”

“Hey,” she interrupts, placing a hand on his forearm. “You don’t have to stay in the house with me twenty-four seven.”

“I don’t have the chance to, anyway,” he sighs. “Fury won’t let me.”

“Okay, that’s not the point,” she returns, rolling her eyes in amusement. “The point _is_ , you need to go out more,” she takes another sip of juice. “You’ve been home tending to me for weeks now. Go do something fun.”

“But I always have fun with you, you know that,” he answers honestly and without hesitation. She stares at him for a beat, a light blush making it’s way over her cheeks as she processes his words.

“I can say the same for you,” she lifts her hand to rest it gently under his chin and he leans into her touch almost immediately. “But, please? For me?” she pouts and he can’t help but laugh at her last line because that’s what he always says to her when he wants _her_ to do something for _him_. He squints his eyes and tilts his head as he pretends to think about it for a few seconds before finally giving in and making a deal that he’d only go if she promised not to overwhelm herself with paperwork anymore, to which she replied with a quiet “We’ll see”. They’ve fallen into a comfortable silence as they eat, sending affectionate glances and smiles at each other every now and then. He notices a significant change in Natasha’s mood since he first woke her up for which he’s beyond grateful for.

It’s not always this pleasant.

Some days her mood swings get the best of her, leaving her _highly_ irritable. Just a few days ago, Clint had been on the receiving end of her rage for talking too loudly around her. She’d apologized profusely the next day, feeling nothing but guilty for going off the way she did, but Clint had told her there was no need, that he knew it was the hormones talking, not her. The two had gone out for ice cream afterwards, her treat, and they returned as happy as ever. Other days, James feels helpless as he tries to comfort her through tiresome crying spells. Today is one of the good days, though.

“Is Her Highness finished yet?” he asks when he notices her empty plate, aside from about two bites of toast left. She smiles and nods her head, giving a soft thanks as when he takes her plate for her and rests it back on the tray along with his.

“Are you still tired?” he asks softly when she repositions herself to rest her head on his lap.

“Just a little,” is her quiet response as she traces little circles on the duvet with her finger. “Not too tired to stay up and talk to you, though,” he can hear the fondness in her voice and, he thinks, his heart might just combust with how obliviously endearing she really is.

“Wait — stay right here, I’ll be right back,” he pats her back gently for her to get up.

“What’re you doing?”

“Just sit tight,” he grins when he reaches the door. “Won’t even be gone for two minutes.” he winks as he leaves a highly confused but curious Natasha alone.

He comes back one minute and forty seven seconds later — not that she was counting or anything — with a black bowl filled with strawberries, a miniature bowl with melted chocolate and the brightest smile.

“James…” she returns the smile.

“Natalia?”

<“You really are too good to me, darling.”> she sighs happily when he returns to his spot on the bed, beckoning to her to sit on his lap. She goes eagerly and gives him a kiss on his cheek, soft and pure.

<“No one is good enough for you — ”>

<“ _You_ are more than enough. Believe me.”> she insists. He watches her for a few moments, looks deep into her jade green eyes as he thinks of how to put words together for how much he _feels_ for her. He gives up eventually and before he knows it, he’s leaning in until their lips are locked again because it’s the only way he can express himself at times like this. Natasha understands of course — she’s the only one that does — and returns the kiss. Eventually, he pulls away so she can catch her breath and she leans her head down over his chest.

<“I love you.”> he whispers.

<“And I love you. So much.> she returns as he pulls her closer like he’s protecting her from something. Which, in his mind, he is. He’s shielding her from all things he couldn’t before — the awful horrors of the world they live in, her demons, her enemies, her dark thoughts, the nightmares — anything and everything else that could possibly make her unhappy.

At some point, he pulls away a little as he reaches for the two bowls. He hands her the one with chocolate and dips a strawberry in. She tries to hold back a smile when he holds it out in front of her but fails and takes a bite anyway.

“‘M not a _baby_ , y’know,” she mentions after swallowing.

He scoffs playfully and raises his eyebrows in mock surprise. “Could’ve fooled me.”

“Yeah, yeah,” she reaches for a strawberry from the bowl and does the same as James did with her.

“Wait, hold on. There’s something…” she starts. Natasha leans forward and raises her thumb up to his bottom lip where a drop of chocolate sat. She wipes it off ever so gently and brings her thumb to her mouth, sucking it off clean with a smirk and playful glint in her eye. His eyes are trained on her lips until she’s finished, and Natasha can’t help the giggle that comes out when she sees the look of pure heat in his eyes.

 _She never fails to amaze me_.

“What on Earth are we going to do with you, milii moi?” he smirks.

“ _That_ , Mr. Barnes, is entirely up to you,” she purrs while raising a perfectly arched brow, leaning back onto her hands and he hums.

“I have something in mind…”

“Oh, _do_ enlighten me.” At that, he grabs her waist and pulls her forward again, kissing her when she starts to laugh. He proceeds to dip a finger in the bowl of chocolate — a metal one at that — and trails it along her collar bone and she can’t help the heat that pools in her gut when she realizes where he’s going with this. He lifts the same finger up to her mouth and pulls it away teasingly just as she’s about to lick it off, causing her to whine softly when he does it instead.

“Looks like _you_ have something right…” he trails off when he leans in and leaves small marks in his path, causing her long sigh of satisfaction to turn into a soft moan. He’s teasing her now, brushing his lips lightly across all her sensitive areas when all the chocolate is gone. James leans back up and can’t help but chuckle at how her eyes are hooded and her mouth is slightly open. “…There.” James knows her well enough to expect her to have a smart comeback, so he closes the space between them once more, and Natasha can’t help but hum into the kiss when she tastes the chocolate — the chocolate he just provocatively licked off of _her_ — as it melts in her mouth.

“Don’t start something you can’t finish,” she warns half-heartedly, knowing that her words would only encourage him further and give her an even better time.

“Something _I_ can’t finish?” he grins. “We’ll see about that.”

* * *

“Which chapter were we up to?”

Many shared strawberries, kisses, caresses and a much needed nap later, James and Natasha headed down to the living room. They ate dinner (Natasha’s cravings had her asking for pizza) and had decided to wind down for the rest of the evening. Natasha had suggested he read a chapter for her from the novel she was currently reading, _The Captain’s Daughter_ by Alexander Pushkin — had said that she loved his ‘reading voice’. He’d tried to hide a blush — which she saw, of course — but agreed all the same.

James had read to her before. He’d thought back to the first time he did — just a few weeks ago when she’d had her first crying spell. He’d gone downstairs for a few minutes to get them a snack only to come back to her curled up in their bed, tears streamed down her cheeks and Liho curled up by her stomach.

 _“Natalia?” he says when he gets by the doorframe. She’s not crying, really — not yet, at least. But seeing Natasha with tears down her cheeks is concerning enough. He walks across the room and kneels down by the edge of the bed to be on the same level as her. Her eyes are red and she’s biting her bottom lip as if trying to hold back her emotions. "Hey,” he says gently, wiping away some of her tears as he caresses her cheek. He watches as she glances down at two packs of the mini oreos in his other hand before speaking again. “Love, what’s wrong?” Clearly his last words broke the wall she had tried so desperately to hold up, causing her to let out a whimper and her bottom lip to tremble before the real waterworks started. About five seconds later, she’s sobbing into her pillow and James doesn’t think he could be any more worried and confused than he is now. She was_ fine _when he’d left, had been laughing at a corny joke he told her before he went downstairs._ What happened?

_“Tasha, you gotta talk to me…” he says gently as he climbs up in bed with her and pulls her onto his lap, holding her as close to him as possible. She’s crying relentlessly into his grey henley now, her tears making dark spots on his chest. He waits about thirty seconds, rubbing her back and kissing her head the whole time, before realizing that she’s not going to stop on her own like she usually does. He sighs quietly and pulls back just enough to lift her chin up to look at him. <“What’s the matter?> _

_“‘M–I’m sor–sorry.” > she chokes out. It takes him a bit to understand what she’d said, but he gets it soon enough. _

_ <“What’re you sorry for?”> he asks, genuine confusion clear in his voice. _

_ <“For being s–such a bother all the time.”> she whimpers. <“All you’ve been doing these past few weeks is–is _ getting _and_ doing _stuff for me_ all _the time. ‘Nd I ‘precciate it, I really d–do, but it’s not fai–air to you…” > she rambles on, voice cracking at almost every other word from crying so much. His heart breaks seeing her so torn up, especially since what she’s upset about isn’t the least bit true. James knows that he should’ve expected her to have a breakdown sooner or later. Back when they first told their friends the good news, Clint had told him that he went through something similar with Laura when she was pregnant with Cooper and Lila — Nate had been her easiest pregnancy. He’d explained that he shouldn’t worry too much, that if it were to happen, his main focus should be getting Natasha calm. He also knows that all this is a result of her hormone levels being out of whack, so she’s more sensitive and overthinks more than she usually does. _

_“Talia, listen to me,” she hesitated at first — and was still crying, though, not as hard as before — but finally made eye contact with him. “You will_ never _be a burden to me. Ever.” he said, quiet but firm. “D’you remember what I said in my vows all those years ago?” she looked down for a second before nodding her head slowly. “Tell me.”_

_“Natalia Alianovna Romanova, words can’t explain how utterly blessed I am to be — "_

_“Not the whole thing, silly,” he laughed, and that brought a small smile to her face for a short moment. “Just the middle part.”_

_“Um… Th–through thick and thin, the good and bad, sickness and health — I’ll be by your side through any and everything?”_

_“Yeah,” he pets the small of her back in assurance. “Keep going…”_

_“No matter what thoughts are going on in that pretty little head of yours–uh, or whatever bad feelings you get in your heart, know that I will always love you?” she recites quietly._

_“Say that last part again.”_

_“Know that I will always love you…”_

_“Again.”_

_She relaxes a little into his hold as she sniffles, resting her chin atop his shoulder and clutching onto his shirt a little tighter. “You will always love me.”_

_“Exactly,” he says. He’s rocking slowly side to side now, calming her down bit by bit. “There’s_ nothing _about you that would make me think of you as a bother,_ please _understand that, Natalia.” he says. “You being pregnant and a little hungry isn’t changing that,” he chuckles. She nods her head, but she’s overbreathing still. At that moment, James gets an idea. Lifting her up slightly so he could move better, he reaches across to the bottom of her nightstand to pick up her favorite book—something he_ knows _should calm her down. Returning back to his original position, he opens the book behind her so he could read out loud._

_“Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister on the bank and of having nothing to do: once or twice she had peeped into the book her sister…”_

_Almost immediately, Natasha had fully relaxed at hearing his words — Alice in Wonderland had always been her favorite book — and Disney movie — and hearing James read it to her was infinitely more comforting. By the eighth page, her hyperventilating had completely stopped, only taking deep breaths every few minutes._

_“...were really impossible. There seemed to be no use in waiting by the little door, so she went back — hey, you okay?” he asked when he realized how quiet and still she’d gotten._

_She nods her head against his chest. “James?” she whispers and he hums, indicating that he’s listening. <“I love you.”> _

_ <“And I love you.”> he kisses the crown of her head _

“Uh,” Natasha looks down, eyebrows furrowed slightly in thought. “Seven? I think? Or was it eight?” her soft voice brings him back to reality, and it’s only then that he realizes he was smiling softly from the memory. “James?” she waved her hand in front of his face briefly.

“Yeah, sorry.”

“Memory lane?” she smirks.

“You know me so well,” he shakes his head in amusement.

“What were you thinking about?”

“When you were crying back in December,” he starts. “I think… I think I have an idea for a name.” She tilts her head up slightly, an indication that she’s listening.

“Aliah,” he says softly. “After your middle name, Alianovna.” Natasha’s not sure what caught her more by surprise — how bashful he seemed to be or the fact that he wanted to name their daughter after _her_. Either way, it’s caused her to tear up.

“You’d wanna name her after _me_?” she manages to say after a few seconds. He has a light blush on his face and he’s wearing that stupid, lopsided smile and Natasha doesn’t think she could name anyone more endearing than him. “You’re serious?” He nods, though, before he can speak, Natasha’s enveloping him in a huge hug with her head buried in his chest.

“I’m taking this as a good reaction…” he wraps his arms around her, returning the gesture. “Wait — this _is_ a good reaction, right?” _This dork._

“Of course it is,” he can hear a faint sniffle after her chuckle. “‘M just…” she sighs as she looks for the right words. “I _really_ , really love you.”

“I could say the same for you.”

“Why Alianovna?” he hears her ask quietly as she plays with the short strands of hair at the back of his neck.

“Well, I want her name to be something with a meaning behind it. I’ve always loved your middle name _—_ I mean, I love your first and last ones too, but Alianovna’s always had a special place in my heart — ”

“But why?” she asks, face contorted with confusion.

“I was getting there,” he shakes his head in amusement. “What was your last cover name?”

“Nadya Raymann. Why?”

“And the one from when you were working undercover with Stark back in ‘10?”

“Natalie Rushman, you know this,” she chuckles.

“Now, tell me the one from that mission in Manila.”

“Uh, Naomie Roberts.”

“Exactly,” he says softly. “A lot of your covers are just alliterations of your real name, but the one thing that’s never exposed is Alianovna, hence why I love it so much.”

“How symbolic of you,” is her deadpan response, but the warmth in her voice is as clear as day. “I love it.” she says, finally looking up at him.

“I’m glad you do,” he leans down to peck her lips, bringing a beautiful, bright smile from her. They can hardly wait for their bundle of sunshine, now known as Aliah, to arrive.

**END**

**Author's Note:**

> sorry for the extremely late update, i had a serious case of writers block. but tell me what you guys think <3


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